Smart Guys Fall Asleep

After a weekend out-of-state trip that included lots of good eating and me dusting a group of inexperienced yet competitive eight-year-olds at the go-cart track (yes sadly I am proud), the older boy and I had a long travel day on Sunday.

This conversation may or may not have occurred on the final leg of the return trip--a 3 1/2 hour drive from big city airport to home.

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SON: Dad, what time do you think we'll get home?

ME: It is after 9 pm now, so before 1 AM.

SON: Ok, I think I am going to try to sleep. I have never slept in a car except for a few minutes on our Arkansas trip. I don't think I can fall asleep with all of the truck noise, but I feel a tired. I remember when...

The one-side conservation went on for a couple of minutes and then all was silent.  The quiet was eventually replaced by light snoring.

Three hours later...


ME: Hey man, you awake.

SON: Yeah, sure. Why?

ME: You've been asleep the whole drive. We are pulling up on your neighborhood.

He presses his head against the rear window trying to see out beyond the glare of street lamps.

SON: No way. What time is it?

ME: It is 12:30 am.

SON: Wow, so I did go to sleep?  I can't believe it.

ME: Congrats son. Falling asleep at anytime while doing anything is a useful skill that men have been perfecting for centuries.

My son rubs his eyes and stares out the window.  I continue...

ME: In the future, you'll learn that dozing off at opportune times will prevent you from getting into trouble, delay unexciting work tasks, make boring travel fly by, and allow you to overcome the occasional time that 40 winks creates some grief in your life.

In any event, practice random sleeping and you'll generally be a well rested dude--but if your mom asks, we never had this conversation.

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This masculine survival tip was brought to you free of charge by, well, a male survivor.

18 comments:

Dan said...

It is an important skill. It is also important to gain the adjunct skill of sleeping while sitting up - it will come in handy at all meetings.

Jinksy said...

I could do with that skill- especially after I've woken up at 4.30 am and can't get back to sleep... :)

Chip "Rocket Man" Allen said...

During my first hitch in the USAF I perfected the art of sleeping anywhere at any time. On more than one occasion I even managed to fall asleep standing up.

MONICA-LnP said...

Next you'll be telling him how to make it look like your listening when your not!lol

ladyfi said...

LOL! It really is a wonderful skill. I had it when I was younger, but not anymore - sadly.

Clarissa Draper said...

I have been so jealous of my husband's ability to drop off at any moment. I can't do that, especially when my husband is driving because he has fallen asleep behind the wheel. I think it's best if I just drive.

Brian Miller said...

hahaha...yes it is a useful skill to develop...fun convo...

Jeanette Levellie said...

I have a very difficult time doing this--can you give lessons?

My Husband's Watching TV... said...

I used to think I never slept in the car either because I just took the "shortcut." You know, my parents told me to close my eyes and they'd take the "shortcut" home. I loved the shortcut; unfortunately, it doesn't work when you're driving.

Stephanie Faris said...

Cute! I will say the simple joy of falling asleep on a boring road trip to wake up three or four hours later (or even an hour) and find you're that much closer to being there is one of the best things in life!

Dawn said...

pffft! and do you know how ANNOYING this "skill" is to us women???
;))
The men in this house have been known to fall asleep while reading to younger children, putting children to bed, and falling asleep while at the dinner table.
Skill my foot!;))

James (SeattleDad) said...

Hahaha. That's awesome. You have just imparted some of the most useful man knowledge he will ever receive. I need a nap now.

Diane said...

I must say, I have a little male in me. I can power nap for five minutes, while sitting up if need be, and then awaken refreshed and ready to continue my day. It's a talent! :O)

joanny said...

Male bonding at its best.

joanny

Candice said...

I need to send this post to my hubby! He can fall asleep at any time. Sometimes it gets him in hot water (like when it's while we are supposed to be hanging out)!

Reggie said...

I'm with Jeanette on this one - do you give lessons? I used to be able to do this so easily when I was younger, but alas...

Maxi said...

Thanks for this one Slam, needed a good laugh.

Bob G. said...

Slamdunk:
Geez, that brings me back to the days when I could nod out on the Frankford Elevated train (always standing, of course)and:
A) was never accosted or robbed.
B) always woke up at MY stop.

It is a "gift" born of years of diligent practice...lol

Great post.
Stay safe.