On Being a Good Neighbor

And from the crime blotter:

Police in Crossville (TN) are still searching for the woman who skinny dipped in a neighbor's pool to distract him while her husband stole from the man's home. ..The incident occurred on the afternoon of June 27 at the victim's home on Canterbury Lane in the Camelot subdivision in Crossville, about 100 miles east of Nashville.


The 54-year-old victim told police he was approached by the couple, who live nearby, and the 30-something-year-old woman asked if she could swim in his pool. According to police, the husband left after his wife asked him to retrieve her cigarettes.

She then asked the victim if it would bother him if she swam naked. He said it would not.

While the woman's husband was gone, he burglarized the home, stealing a handgun, jewelry and medication. The stolen items amounted to $1,195.

During the theft, the woman kept the neighbor distracted for 20 minutes by skinning dipping in his pool. "I went and got her a towel, she dried off and all of a sudden she was soaking wet again.

I escorted her outside and invited her to church, but she said she didn't have time for that, she wasn't ready for that," victim Stephen Amaral told Nashville's News 2...
And where do I go with this story?

Investigative insights?

Burglary prevention tips?

Skin care suggestions for over-exposed swimmers?

Not even.

After reading the end of the story where the alleged accomplice was wrapped in a towel, Chevy Chase's line to a toweled Dana Wheeler-Nicholson when she answers the door in the old movie Fletch pops into my brain:

"Can I borrow your towel for a sec? My car just hit a water buffalo."

Whoa, I think I need more sleep.

I'll work on something more substantive to say regarding these crime stories, and I hope Mr. Amaral doesn't allow any more naked residents of his subdivision in his pool--that activity is not included in the accepted informal "good neighbor" agreement.

In the meantime here is the video clip from Fletch quote described above...


12 comments:

Sorta Southern Single Mom said...

Sometimes, there is nothing more substantive to say!

Blond Duck said...

I'm glad you're back! :)

Pat Hatt said...

Well at least he got a show well being robbed, better than at gun point, although I'm sure something was pointy lol Fletch was a great movie.

Momma Fargo said...

Haha! You made me giggle snort today! I, on another note, find this to be quite funny. Now had it been a female...we could watch the distraction and catch the burglary.

messymimi said...

A good reason to get to know who the good neighbors are -- and aren't.

lisa said...

I'm not sure where you go with this story either. I can't even imagine allowing someone I don't know well swim in my pool....much less skinny dip! I'd think any self-respecting 54-year-old man would have excused himself to go inside once the clothes came off! Just sayin'.....

Brian Miller said...

one more reason not to let strange women swim naked in your pool....ha....fletch was awesome too

BobKat said...

ahhh, su*ks to be 54, lol. That is choreographed burglary! Perfect scam. Well, if the victim was gay I suspect the outcome might have been different.

It's also the lowest of the lows to take advantage and scam someone like that. What goes through the minds of criminals like that???

Good catch Slam. Naps you're allowed, hiatuses not so much.

You're doing good!

EC Stilson said...

I LOVE this post. You had me laughing so hard. Wow--what a crime scene lol

Bob G. said...

Slamdunk:
I'd really hate to borrow from P.T. Barnum's "There's one born every minute", but I can't think of anything that FITS as well...

Granted, this wasn't a scene from Burt Lancaster's "THE SWIMMER", but...
Goes to prove NO peep-show is ever "free".

Stay safe out there.

Clarissa Draper said...

What a crazy story! How brazen. I hope the victim recorded all birth marks or tattoos.

terri said...

I'd say that criminal couple made pretty good use of their assets to pull off their planned crime!