As the husband/father here, I deserve more than my share of the blame for things.
Blame me for making the non-refundable hotel reservation for son's soccer tournament when there is a chance his team could be eliminated on Day 1 and we would have no need to stay for Day 2.
Blame me for the pile of papers and football magazines hidden under the living room chair. I don't feel like walking upstairs every time I "need" them.
Blame me for the mustard stain on my t-shirt; as well as the mustard stains on 5 or 6 other shirts in the Dad closet.
Blame me for the milk stain on the ceiling in the kitchen. Who knew that liquid from a gallon jug could explode so high when simply dropped at waist-high?
Blame me for the foot odor. I don't need to add anything to this one.
But there is one household problem that Dad cannot be held responsible for.
An ick that needs to be remedied every 4-6 weeks.
In what situation could Dad be totally innocent?
Clogged shower drains.
Specifically, clogged shower drains due to hair.
This "follicly challenged" guy knows the cause of the clog since I am the one summoned every time to fix it.
Nope, that problem is attributed to the two females with long straight hair that reside here.
All their fault.
Now after reviewing the first part of this post, I just need to think of some more problems that I can be removed of as the prime suspect to better balance my scorecard.
This will require some prolonged brain exercises.
I'll go get my Mountain Dew. The one with the screw-on cap to prevent spills.
1 day ago