The Spitter

Many years ago, I was a wide-eyed know-it-all freshman in college.

On my schedule was a course called "Introduction to Biblical Literature."

Dr. Jones taught the class at 8 am sharp.

He was  a slow moving white-haired man in his late 60s or early 70s.

He wore thick glasses and I can only remember him wearing a yellow or green sweaters--the first of many layers.

Well, it was a required class and needless to say we were all sleepy.

A common attempt by the class attendees at humor was in terms of seating preferences.

Specifically, where not to sit.

"Dude, don't sit in the front row of Old Man Jones' class or he will shower you in spittle!"

Yes, Dr. Jones would on occasion get excited about Isaiah or Gideon and "spit talk."

He never seemed to notice and instead was focused on hammering his point to the inattentive audience.

I just giggled when the accusations of talking and spitting were levied.

Old people.

Fast forward several decades.

Though, I don't wear a sweater or discuss the Old Testament, I now stand in front of weary-eyed young adults.

Attempting to communicate.

And when I am exuberant in discussing the arrogance of legendary FBI profiler Robert Ressler or the applicability of Black's Law, I notice myself spitting a little.

"Dude, don't sit in the front row of Old and Bald Man Slamdunk's classes or he will give you a spit shower!"

Somewhere from above, Dr. Jones has to be laughing.

13 comments:

Stephanie Faris said...

Ewww. You reminded me of a professor I had who taught Media Law. He would get this weird gooey stuff on his mouth when he spoke. Mucous? I don't know but it would make me nauseous.

Pat Hatt said...

hahaha and you can't even blame it on the dog. Thankfully I've never had any spittle teachers

messymimi said...

Let's hope they grow up to be equally enthusiastic about something.

Jess said...

Ha! Nice :)

lisa said...

LOLOLOL! You what they say about karma......But I'm sure it's just your imagination. I'm with messymimi in that I hope they develop a passion about something that causes them to spit shower someone! :-)

Brian Miller said...

ha. karma has come to roost....smiles...what goes around
comes around...lol

when they start wearing face shields you are in trouble.

Secret Agent Woman said...

Oh my gosh - I can honestly say that even when I taught 8 am college classes, I did not spit!

ladyfi said...

Ha ha - nice one! It seems that we always turn into our parents... our college professors.

Lisa @ Two Bears Farm said...

Yes, I had a French professor that spittled. After I graduated, he landed in jail for child porn. Scary.

Stina Lindenblatt said...

I had a teacher like that. Only the keeners were brave enough to sit up front.

Carol Kilgore said...

LOL! You had a good teacher.

Tara said...

Karma, eh? LOL.

terri said...

I never had a teacher who spit. My kids' elementary school principal was a spitter though. When it was time for the back-to-school parent meeting, it was a well known fact that you didn't sit in the front row if you wanted to stay dry.